edensgarden's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Home is where the heart is I am home today. The events of last week were more physically taxing than I thought they would be. I was at the movies on Saturday night and I couldn�t move, or think. It was very scary. So there I was sitting in a dark theater not able to move. By the end of the movie I was able to walk out and get in the car and go right to bed when I got home. Sunday I decided that the best course of action would be to stay home one more day and rest and try to prepare for the school week. I am glad I am doing this. I need some time for me. It was nice to wake up at 7:30, when school should have been starting, not 4:30!! I�ve been pondering and meditating a lot in the last week. I�ve come to the conclusion that I might never understand the reasons behind the recent events, or perhaps I won�t understand them for many years to come. I think Mr. Levski�s desire to be with someone, anyone, was greater than his patience could handle. That is the road he has chosen to walk. When the promises of a dear friend are broken, it hurts. But wounds heal. Mine will in time. I am keeping occupied, and surrounding myself with people and the things that I love. I am also throwing myself into my work, even more than before. What is important is that I not become bitter. As I sat in church yesterday this theme was taught over and over again. Forgiveness, patience, longsuffering, and seeking after the good and beautiful things of the world. That is what I am going to do. ***** I drove out to school yesterday afternoon to prepare some lessons for the substitute. By the time I got out and finished, the sun had begun to set. It was a big fire-ball of orange. I had some Aaron Copeland playing on the tape. A perfect combination. I just can�t describe how I felt at that exact moment. It wasn�t happiness, or sadness. I think I just was overwhelmed by the beauty of the whole scene. I needed to see such a miracle last night. For a moment, it made me forget my heartache. 8:18 a.m. - August 26, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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