edensgarden's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- New's Years Resolutions update Thanks for coming today. If you clicked on my banner, let me know and sign my guestbook . ======================================== I've been thinking, we're about two-thirds of the way through the year 2001, what's the point though? The point is that I have not been doing a very good job at keeping some of my New Year's resolutions. Nigh about January 1st I resolved to loose weight (didn't we all?), learn how to knit (ah yes, it's the Martha Stewart tendency), learn how to play the guitar (I wanted to up my 'cool' factor), read good books (no more of that 'Oprah Book Club' crap I fell into), and control my temper and emotions better (no one likes a crybaby!). I mean, I think that those were worthy goals. I know that there are other people out there trying to improve too. But how have I been doing? I don't know, let's analyze� Loose weight. Hmmm��I think that this is something that most American's resolve to do every year? I think I've done ok. I have lost 10 pounds. I joined a gym back in March. I was real GUNG-HO for about the first 2 months. I went 3 times a week for 45 minutes a pop. It was good, I felt better. I also started really watching what I eat. I used to be a real food-Nazi. I mean, I was very regimented with my diet. I ate meat 2 times a week, I ate 5 fruits & veggies a day, very little sugar, no butter, no white bread bla bla bla�ya that's a bla bla bla diet. I liked it, it was good. But then I came to the last semester in college and I needed comfort food, and lots of it, to get thru. So I gained my freshman 15 as a senior. Go figure! I'm not quite as Gestapo-ish as I was before, but I'm not living on cheeseburgers and fries anymore either. I just want to fit into my black dress again. I'm half way there. Like I said, I was doing well at the gym and then I broke my toe in May, I've just never been back. I think I'll use my tax refund (thanks W, and I don't care what surplus or fund got raided or depleted--I'm $300 richer!) and buy a few sessions with a trainer. Maybe that will help motivate me and give me some new ideas on exercise. Knitting I've not even attempted this. Why did I want to learn this in the first place? Well my great-grandmother used to knit. She was always one of my favorite people. I remember sitting on the floor at her house eating cookies, watching Lawrence Welk and watching her knit. Every year at Christmas she made something for each great-grandchild (the last Christmas she was able to do this, there were over 75 of us). I have a box full of, slippers, embroidered pillow cases, hotpads, and doilies all made by her. I want to be able to make things like this for my eventual posterity. My sister, M-1, started to knit this year, she says it's very relaxing. And besides, she has all sorts of cool things she's made. Last Saturday as I was out and about, I found myself walking down Main Street past the Yarn Shop, thinking about this goal. I need to go back this weekend and check things out. Guitar Playing I am musical by nature. I sing, but do not play an instrument at present. I did play violin in a former life and time, but that talent left after the 7th grade and constant whining got me out of piano lessons numerous times. I always envy people at parties that whip out their guitars and start playing. Everybody gathers round that person and ooo's and ahh's. How cool would that be? Then again I have to consider that fact that I sometimes just like to hang to the rear at parties. Wallflowering has its advantages, and if I fly low under the radar I don't have to worry about tacky pick-up lines and dodging weirdos. Finances have also prevented me from reaching this goal. School is VERY expensive (like always), and that's to be expected. Who knows, maybe it's a good thing I haven't invested the time or money, considering, my less-than-stellar track record in the musical instrument department Reading good books. Yes, I admit, I was into the whole Oprah book club thing. It pains me to admit it, but it's true. After reading about 8 of her monthly selections I came to the realization that these books were mostly just empty brain calories and full of questionable subject matter. I didn't put these books down and say, "WOW that was SOOO good, I think I'll recommend it to a friend." So, I started to read Ana Karenina by Tolstoy. It's a long one, I've yet to get past page 100. I also started to read Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin. Again I have failed in this and am not even out of the first chapter. But why read it when I own both movies? Hmmm�I don't know. I also just need to accept that fact that I am a nerd and love reading history books and Foreign Policy Magazine. FP is definitely NOT empty brain calories! Emotions and Temper. I've learned a lot about myself this year. I think you always do when you start and then break-up a relationship. After years of feeling like I would never fall in love again, I did. I fell in love with one of the world's most wonderful people. I loved that. It was almost euphoric. I also learned that as my 'love quotient' rises, so does my 'irritated quotient'. I guess you have to take the good with the bad. That was one of the root causes of the break-up with Mr. B. I was irritated, and then my temper flew, words were said, feelings hurt and a friendship ruined. Of course, upon realizing the consequences of my actions, I did some serious soul searching, swallowed my pride, admitted my mistakes and asked for forgiveness. The results of all of this remain to be seen, but I have hope. Over the last few weeks, however, when I've found myself in a potentially emotional situation, I've stepped back and assessed said situation, then acted or reacted. It's been good. I still have to figure out a way though to quit crying when I hear sappy songs on the radio though. I don't know how that started, or how to stop it. Maybe, I just need to start carrying Kleenex in my purse, or listening to the heavy metal or the hip-hop radio station. That way I won't understand the lyrics or the music, and then no tears. So, there it is, my year in Two-thirds review. I don't know, maybe I've not done so badly after all. To quote Sting, "I've been scattered, I've been shattered, I've been knocked out of the race but, I'll get better!" Hmmmm�I think for now I'll just eat a Tootsie Roll! All for today kids! ~~Eden 11:39 a.m. - August 29, 2001 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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